Diatribes by Joah

Prime Interests...no, I'm not talking money

(Update: Sorry it's so long.)

A friend recently asked if I wanted to go to a bar that was having a drink special and I replied that I couldn't because I'd be home watching the NBA Draft. Not being a huge sports fan, like myself, he was astonished.

Now, this is perfect timing because just the other day another friend who is new to D.C. asked me how to make new friends. And my reply was "do things you're interested in and that's where people you can be friends with are."

The way I see it, drinking at a bar can happen any day of the year. Well except Sundays in 'blue law' places like South Carolina, but just about everywhere else. Drink specials happen a few days a week. Or, better yet, I have a near-full bar at home if I want to get plastered. And I have very few instances where I've made lasting friends (and definitely not girlfriends) from bars.

But the NBA Draft...especially one that includes sure-fire studs like Kevin Durant and Greg Oden (not to mention the Florida Gators), is an evening in front of the TV that cannot be missed. Not because I'm getting any closer to dating someone out of it, but because it's just too interesting to not watch.

But this same friend who asked if I wanted to hit a bar is probably also thinking, "Joah watches a lot of TV." Because he's noted that on multiple occasions, I've made references to needing to watch The Wire or Sopranos or Entourage or 24 or Heroes. And he'd be exactly right. I do watch a lot of TV.

TV/Entertainment and sports are prime examples of what I call "prime interests". In other words, if you don't like these things, we sure as hell better have a lot of other things in common to be friends. And my future wife will hopefully at least tolerate watching my favorite shows and going to the occasional baseball game. These are deal breakers.

But they're not just deal breakers, they're also things of interest that allow me to connect to people. They help me maintain connections with people and develop friendships. I can't tell you how many friends I've made and people I've met because we both LOVE the Dallas Cowboys (here in Redskins territory) or we both like going to concerts or we both like running.

A perfect example is my buddy at work, Will, who never stops arguing with me about something. But in the end, we both realize we're only arguing because we're both pretty passionate about some of the same things. This is a guy I consider a friend because we have mutual respect even in disagreement. My brother and I will be probably grow old being the same way. Arguing about Tim Duncan and the underrated, but non-dynasty, Spurs for decades.

So while 24 and the NBA Draft aren't "prime interests" they fit into categories that are. I've found maximizing the time I spend on my "prime interests" makes each day very engaging. Mostly because I know - over the course of the average day when I'll talk to any combination of my best friends, my family members, and my co-workers - that the things I'm interested in will be discussed in an engaging conversation.

Now, some people think watching TV is about the least engaging thing anyone can do, but not me. TV, to me, is right up there with all the other things I do to make each day interesting and worth mentioning or remembering. Ultimately, each day becomes 365 days.

These are my "Prime Interests":

Sports - On a 1-to-10 scale, I'm at about a 10 for being a sports fan. NFL, NCAA, NBA, MLB, NASCAR, PGA, ATP, you name it. I subscribe to Sports Illustrated and ESPN the Mag and I'm an Insider. I won my fantasy football league last year. I'm typically very good at predicting the Final Four. And I'm not just a fan when it involves my favorites like the Dallas Cowboys or the L.A. Lakers or the Atlanta Braves or Jeff Gordon or Tiger Woods or the Texas Longhorns, I'm a fan of it all. My brother is the only person I've ever met that categorically knows more about sports than I do. I grew up in a neighborhood where about 30 kids played basketball and football and baseball for hours on end. And an older brother that is worthy of being on ESPN.

Music - On a 1-to-10 scale, I'm at about a 9. I have a one-concert-per-month rule. I watch music videos when I get dressed for work in the morning. I listen to music when I go to bed at night. I talk about music with the Vice Chairman of the company I work for. I dream of one-day being a presenter at the Grammys and I've met Pharrell and Fergie and Kanye. I'd like to know a bit more about world music, but I haven't traveled enough to really take it all in. One of the main reasons I love hardwood floors, which I refuse to live without, is so I can have open dancing space in my home. I grew up with music and dancing going on in my home and my grandmother's home. My children will too. And another older brother that dreams of being the next Kanye West, athough he wouldn't make that direct reference.

Entertainment - On a 1-to-10 scale, this one is about a 9. Most of my friends can tell you when it comes to TV, movie or entertainment news, I'm the one to ask. I watch HBO like an addict. I absolutely love knowing about upcoming TV shows and movies before everyone, so I can share the scoop. I read and subscribe to about a zillion magazines a week. I've even done a movie preview for the last two years to update friends on what good movies to look forward to each year. And this year, I've been about 90 percent accurate. I don't keep up with gossip though, so I'll never be a 10.

Politics - On a 1-to-10 scale, I'm at about a 8. Politics is one of those things that has many audiences. Some of my friends like to talk foreign policy, but know nothing of campaigning. Some know campaigns, but nothing about Congress. Others know the Hill, but not local government. I put myself at a 8, and not higher, mostly because I can admit that I'm not nearly as knowledgeable as I one-day hope to be about politics. But I do put myself around people that know about foreign policy and campaigning and Congress and all the other stuff. I learn by proxy. Even right now, I know I'm more engaged and informed than most 24-year-olds, but that's not saying much because a vote doesn't have an age and I want my vote to be based on as much information as a 48-year-old that's interested in politics knows. A year from now, I'd like to say I'm at about a 9.

Information - I was going to call this "books" or "learning", but I think information sums it up better. I'm about an 8. I absolutely LOVE getting new information. Even when I think I know everything, I quietly go about finding out more about that topic or issue or arena. I read biographies religiously. I already mentioned all the magazines - and I'm talking Vanity Fair and The New Yorker, not Entertainment Weekly all the time. I visit too many Websites to list. Most of all, I meet a lot of new and smart people. I think that's the single-most important way to get information. Not to believe everything you hear, but to listen enough to know what's being said. I have a lot of friends and colleagues who I've never thanked for helping me know more about so many things like foreign policy and music and sports and politics and business. Thank you all. When I talk to people about networking, I'm really talking about information gathering.

Business - I'm at about a 6, going on a 7. I love following business. Not just business trends, but business. Business practices that relate to hiring, leadership, investing, entrepreneurship, mergers and acquisitions, marketing, and all kinds of other relevant business elements. I dream of someday owning my own business. Preferably something that combines food and music and education. Not sure what exactly, but I have some thoughts that I look forward to fleshing out. And whenever my friends come to me with business ideas, even when I'm skeptical of their abilities to foster that idea into a success, I offer whatever I can because the best businesses start with ideas and honest friends. Ask Bill Gates and Paul Allen. At least, that's what I think.

Being Active - I'm at about a 9. I love the outdoors even more than I love TV. I love running and wakeboarding and thrill-seeking and finding new places. Just last night my friend and I embarked on a park I've never been to before here in Washington. I love walking places. I love road trips. When I travel, which I include in "being active", I like going places that allow me to quickly begin taking in the surroundings like a resident and not a tourist. That's one of the reasons I haven't been overseas yet. And don't get me wrong, I love going to bars and partying. I've been to most of the bars here in D.C. (and in Austin before that) before most people I know have largely because I'm not too proud or afraid to try a new place by my lonesome on occasion. On my list of "things to do before I die" are: run a marathon in under 2 hours and 45 minutes, do a backflip while wakeboarding, skydive over the Amazon, and go to every major music (i.e. ACL) and film (i.e. Sundance) festival in the world. Oh, and if anyone is in the D.C. area and needs a tennis partner, I'm game. It's also important to note that I can't date a girl that doesn't share this.

Writing - While I love reading, writing is so much more fulfilling. Even when people look at my writing and judge me incorrectly, which happens a lot because I'm uncompromising and candid and brash, I love it. Easily, I'm at an 11 for this one. Beyond these diatribes, I love to write poetry. I have plans to write a book-per-year for the rest of my life, even if my future wife has to do the writing and I talk like Bruce Lee. I would love to write for magazines or newspapers or blogs or TV shows or movies someday. In general, I just like the feeling - call it ego if you want - of writing down something I'm thinking about and someone saying they found it insightful or interesting. Those words are much more important than if you think I'm good or not.

Other things worthy of mention include: fashion, food/wine, visiting friends or having friends visit me, throwing parties, nonprofit involvement (this could go up there in between politics and information in some cases), predicting anything, landscaping.

In closing, I guess that's the reason I choose the NBA Draft over drinks at a bar. Or why I choose to watch Entourage instead of talk about what CNN is telling me. Because I find those things more insightful and interesting. Not necessarily because they make me smarter, but more so because they make the days more memorable.

Out of 365 days a year, just about all of them involve sports, music, politics, business, information, being active and writing. If drinking replaced even just one of those things, I'd be an alcoholic within a week.

And I'd really have a problem keeping friends outside of the ones I'd make in AA.

Don't Bullshit a Bullshitter

My brother knows more about sports than me. He's also older. My mom knows more about parenting than me. She's also got three kids. My best friend Stephanie knows more about teaching than me. She's a teacher. My boss knows more about politics than I do. He's been around it a decade-plus longer. My best friend Colby knows more about the war in Iraq than I do. He's in the Army and has been in Baghdad for over a year. My friends Peter and Sheena know more about science than I do. They're nature freaks. My friends Joe and Obi know more about law than I do. They're close to finishing law school. And Ron Jeremy knows more about sex than I do. You get the point.

Have you seen this ESPN commercial about the guy talking out of his ass about sports? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAs6TDLuKgQ

Basically, what the commercial teaches us is that you need to know what the hell you're talking about before you pretend to be ready to share your knowledge. Don't start talking out of your ass with me and think you're going to get away with it. Now, I'm no exception, I've bullshitted many a time about politics when I was in high school or traveling even though I've never used a passport. But in maintaining my promise to be open, honest and insightful, I'm going to briefly talk about some people that need to stop bullshitting me.

Now you have never heard me bullshit about sports or music or politics or any of the aforementioned topics. At least not intentionally. You may have heard me voice an opinion about something that was not in line with your position on the issue, but you damned sure haven't heard me talking out of my ass.

I'm not going to talk about Harry Potter...because I haven't read any of the books. And my (long lost) friend Jen can tell you I only argued with her about the death penalty to play devil's advocate, not because I consider myself any type of authority on the subject. Nor will you hear me talking about Palestine-Israeli relations because I'm no expert. Same thing when it comes to engineering or theatre or pre-Renaissance art or pre-American history. There are just some things I'm willing to admit I don't know enough to discuss at length.

But that other stuff, I know. So when someone tries to talk to me about these things, I'm going to be able to call bullshit from a light year away. If you've never talked about baseball and all of a sudden you're trying to talk about why Pete Rose doesn't deserve to be in Cooperstown, then I'm calling bullshit. If you haven't been to at least a dozen concerts, I'm calling bullshit on your music nut credentials (my brother is probably the lone exception). If you've never ran a race, don't call yourself an avid runner. And worst of all, if you've never voted, don't talk Washington politics. Not with me, not with anyone.

I don't mean to be mean-spirited, but I just can't stand it when Mr. or Ms. "Let me check this Website really quick so I know what I'm talking about" Out of My Ass tries to sound informed about something instead of simply saying "no, I haven't heard that" or "no, I didn't know that".

Friends - PLEASE CALL BULLSHIT ON ME IF I'M EVER GUILTY OF THIS!

However, instead of simply voicing my rant, I figured I'd add a fun element to it by asking people, you can do it in your head if you want, to see if they can do the quiz below without help from any Website or outside reference.

1) What day are the U.S. Billboard charts updated each week?

2) Name three movies Hugh Jackman acted in last year.

3) Name six current Cabinet Secretaries.

4) Who has the #5 pick in this week's NBA Draft?

5) What city is home to the Quicken Loans Arena?

6) How many U.S. Amateurs did Tiger Woods win?

7) What sport does Tom Glavine play? What other sport drafted him out of high school?

8) Name one person that scored higher than Bill Gates on the SAT.

9) How much was MySpace purchased for? By what company?

10) Who came up with the term "three-peat"?

11) Who framed Roger Rabbit?

12) Where is Carmen Sandiego?

Obviously, this doesn't prove anything. Just thought I'd end it on a less asshole-friendly note. That's all.

How the game is played

I have a lot of unique and interesting dating stories. Even in the last six months alone, I probably have more interesting experiences than most people in their entire 20-somethings. It's just one of those things that seems to follow me wherever I go. In the airport, in the grocery store, even in the bookstore. I can't get away from being in situations that require me to play "the game."

***Let me preface this by saying I will be writing a book called "How the Game is Played" and anyone that steals the following concept is doing so in admission and full acknowledgment that said idea was in fact stolen from me as to be verified by my best friend Stephanie.***

Last night, before I committed the rest of my evening to HBO, I was watching that Kevin Costner baseball movie "For Love of the Game". It was a sign, because the game I'm referring to is a hell of a lot like baseball. That said, I'm going to start a running series about how I play the game. I'll start, this week, by going through my understanding of the rules. Yes, you'll need to know a little about the game of baseball to make sense of this.

For starters, baseball has three types of players - batters, pitchers, and fielders. "The game" is the same way. The batters are guys like myself. Guys that are willing to step up and strike out if it means the next time up to bat, I'll have a better chance of getting a hit.

The pitchers are women. And like baseball - where there are starting pitchers, middle relievers, and closers - there are three types of pitchers/women. Starting pitchers are the girls you want to be your girlfriend. Middle relievers are the girls you want to give you great sex, but without commitment. And closers...well, let's just say they're only being asked to perform for one or two innings a night.

The fielders are the toughest to peg. We're all fielders at one point or another. Fielders are the people that respond to the game as its being played, only they didn't actually ask to join the game. For example, when a pitcher throws a fastball and the batter hits it into the outfield, it's then up to the fielder to run the ball down and catch it to get the out. Similarly, in "the game" it's up to the fielder to make the out. An out can be anything from ending a dating relationship to being a wingman. It's all about responding to unexpected or unplanned circumstances.

So those are the players. In baseball, there are a few ways to get called out as a batter. You can strike out swinging or looking. You can hit a ground ball and be thrown out at first. You can hit a fly ball, which is then caught for the out. With that in mind, that explains the various ways to be called out in "the game": a strike out would be equivalent to using an ill-advised pickup line (swinging) or simply being ignored (looking), a ground ball out is like buying a girl a drink only to see her walk back to her friends, a fly out is akin to asking a girl to dance, dancing for one song, then watching her leave without getting her phone number. In each case, the reason the out was made was because of a lack of follow-through at the plate (the introduction/setup).

Oh, let me also address another part of the game. In baseball, a pitcher can throw four balls for a walk. Also, a pitcher can mistakenly off-set his pitching motion, which results in a balk, which automatically advances the batter and any baserunners. Neither of these are available in "the game" because of an important part of the game: the umpires are the pitcher's (her) friends. That means, a) you're never going to be giving four balls before three strikes (girls always rescue their friends when they're struggling at the mound) and you'll never be the benefactor of a balk (girls always react in favor of their friend or reluctance [in other words, no girl will accidentally find herself answering the phone when you call if she never really wanted to date you], which means you'll have to earn every base).

I hope this is starting to come together because now I'll discuss the ways you can get on base and, hopefully, score. First, though, let me explain something. The game of baseball isn't about which teams hits the most homeruns. The game of baseball is won or lost by how many runs are scored. No baseball team would trade one solo homerun, for ten base hits. Base hits equal run production. Thus, homeruns are not the only way a player can score in the game.

There are singles, doubles, triples, ground-rule doubles, home runs and stolen bases in baseball. The same can be said of "the game." I liken a single to getting a phone number. If you get a phone number, a base hit, you have a runner on base. That means you have a chance to score eventually. Each conversation at this point is an at-bat. If you get a double, putting yourself on second base, that's equivalent to going on a date. At this point, your chances of scoring are between 70-30 and 50-50. You could either get three outs before you make it home, or you can make it home...it all depends on your next at-bats (which at this point are dates).

A triple is very respectable. This basically means you've made it through a few dates and your chances of scoring are very likely. This is also where it's important to address stolen bases. Stolen bases are a bit tricky in the game. Unlike baseball, where most steals are from first to second, where the catcher has to make the farthest throw, steals in the game are most common from third to home where the throw (intimacy) is the closest. This concept is very simple. Once a girl has allowed a guy to advance to third base, it means she's already decided she likes the guy enough to go on multiple dates with him. This makes it very difficult to not become intimate with him. Thus, the final base (third-to-home) is stolen because the guy doesn't actually have to work hard for the run (score), he only has to keep doing what he's done, which may have only been one lucky swing of the bat at this point.

Now, I know what you're probably thinking. Does Joah only play the game to get laid? Hell freakin' no. Scoring to me doesn't mean getting laid. Scoring means getting to the point where the guard is let down enough to a) have sex and/or b) have a relationship. I'm FAR MORE interested in b, but I won't pretend I haven't scored the first way plenty before. I'm what you'd call an All-Star at this game. But I'm no MVP yet. Anyway, I'm getting off my point, I'll discuss awards/honors of the game in the next edition.

As for scoring, there are two ways to score: homeruns and engineered runs. Now, most of you are familiar with the New York Yankees. Derek Jeter, Alex Rodriguez today, Joe DiMaggio and Mickey Mantle yesterday. This is a team that thrives on homeruns. Guys that know how to get laid. They have the highest payroll (best looking) and they have the best hitters (hardly ever strike out completely). In today's game, Justin Timberlake - Britney Spears (when she was legit), Cameron Diaz, Scarlett Johannsson, Jessica Biel - would be the reigning MVP. The guy is batting .400 easily. Unfortunately, there are too many guys that dream of playing the field like Justin Timberlake, but end up more like Joey Fatone.  They're batting .250 in a sport where .300 is a really good average. Nevermind Lance Bass.

As for the engineered runs, these are the hardest working men on the planet when it comes to the game. These are the guys that don't have the batting power (good looks) or baserunning skill (ability to blow a girl away in one or two dates, in order to reach second  or third base) to score very often. These are the guys that lose or win games with scores like 1-to-nothing and 3-to-2. These are guys that go on 15-game hitting streaks once or twice a year, and other times they're on 1-for-20 hitting slumps. These are guys that go on dates for weeks and spend all their money and all their mental capacity figuring out things like "what is she thinking" and "should I kiss her" and "why hasn't she called me back". Eight out of ten guys score by engineering runs. The other two are either MVPs or has-beens (guys that just don't get it).

Next in the "How the game is played" series, I'll talk about the different awards/honors you can win for playing the game successfully. I'll also discuss the different types of pitches you can expect as a batter. Also, later in the series, I'll talk about the difference between winning the pennant (division) and winning the World Series (championship)...

Shooting Par for the Stars

I'm sure you've heard that saying, "if you shoot for the stars, you'll land on the moon." It's perhaps one of the best phrases to live by. Just ask Tiger Woods.

This is a man that went on The Bob Hope Show to introduce his golf talents as a three-year-old. This is a guy that broke every conceivable amateur golf record between the ages of 8 and 20. This is a guy that, in 1997, broke the course record at the Master's and beat the world's best golfers by 12 strokes. This is a guy that held all four major championship trophies at one time. This is a guy that made golf course designers try "Tiger-Proofing"...not that it worked though, he's now won 12 major championships. This is a man that will most likely become the first billionaire athlete (he's made $200 million in the last two years alone) within the decade. This is a guy that considers Michael Jordan (basketball) and Roger Federer (tennis) his closest competitors...only they understand his dominance.

Most importantly, this is a man who has told us his life's goal over-and-over since his teen years: breaking legendary golfer Jack Nicklaus' record of 18 major championships. This is a man that may not simply break that record, but smash it like a crystal chandelier. My friends, Tiger Woods is so far beyond the moon, they're going to start naming constellations after him.

So, on Sunday, when Tiger finished second in a second-consecutive major (first the Masters, then the U.S. Open), the golf world fell silent. Pondering how much longer Tiger's stay on the moon would last. Let me remind you, no other active golfer has had a better stretch than Tiger's current run of two wins and two 2nd place finishes in the majors EVER. Not Phil Mickelson. Not Vijay Singh. Not Sergio Garcia. So when I say Tiger was visiting the moon, it's not a moon like the one most of us are familiar with...it's a moon that's brighter and bigger and more monumental than the stars that some of us ever envision ourselves reaching.

The reason I bring this up is because I've talked to several individuals about my life goals. Specifically, my professional goals. And I'm what many would call a "dreamer" when it comes to goal setting. But to see Tiger Woods finish second on Sunday it made me smile to think perhaps I'll someday reach a point where my second-place finishes will be considered disappointments. To me, that'd be a testament to sustained greatness, not a sign of weakness.

Because Tiger Woods realizes that over time he can shoot par and still reach the stars. That's pretty special when you consider that fact that most of us would be happy with reaching his moon.

Vegas...A Numbers Game

For those of you familiar with the stock market, you know the term I.P.O. or Initial Public Offering, which refers to the unveiling (to stock holders) of a publicly-traded company . Well, since this is the public unveiling of Diatribes by Joah, I figured I'd do an I.P.O. of sorts by talking about my trip to L.A. and Vegas.

I could do the normal thing and tell you about how great the weather was in L.A. and how much fun it was to tour the Fox Studio (thanks Kent) and drive Sunset Boulevard, but I'd much rather talk about Vegas. (Also, see the pics on the left toolbar.)

And Vegas is all about numbers. 3-Card Stud Poker. 21 is BlackJack. Dice games. Wheel games. Card games. It all comes down to how the numbers work out. So I'm going to tell you about my trip to Vegas with numbers in mind.

($250) - Yes, for those of you familiar with financial statements the () means I ended up $250 in the hole. I started out winning $90, thanks to back-to-back splits (2s and 10s). Then the numbers caught up to me. At one point, I lost 6 straight BlackJack games because the dealer had 21 and I had 18, 19 or 20. I went to the ATM in New York/New York and promptly lost $100 in three-consecutve BlackJack tables.

2 - Number of girls that made the trip with about a dozen of my frat bros. One was my good friend from high school, Sheena, and the other was my friend/frat bro's more-attractive half, Caren. Needless to say, they got a little more sleep than us guys did over the weekend.

180 - Consecutive minutes I danced at Drais...a place tucked inside Bill's (Crappy) Casino...somehow, Drais was the best after-hours spot in all of Vegas. This was damn-near the highlight of the entire weekend...I think my friends Chris and Joe can confirm that I'm the best dancer alive.

2.5 - Hours of sleep I got on Saturday after I went to bed at 7 a.m. and woke up at 9:30 after a night of losing money.

3.5 - Hours of sleep I got on Sunday after I went to bed at 7 a.m. and woke up at 10:30 after a night of dancing.

$150 - How much I paid for Sheena and I to have dinner at Delmonico in the Venetian for my friend Maggie's birthday. Those lamb chops were fantastic, but $13 for a martini...get serious!

600 - Total minutes spent in the car driving to and from L.A. and Vegas.

900 - Total minutes spent in airports and airplanes traveling to and from L.A. and D.C.

3 - Number of men in Blue Man Group. Saw them Saturday night at the Venetian...this was definitely one of the weekend's highlights.

.750 - Liters of Grey Goose I drank. Well, I probably didn't drink the whole bottle myself, but I know I drank at least half the bottle Saturday late night before the aforementioned dancing at Drais.

15 - Estimated mileage of walking up and down the strip for three days.

$10 - Amount of money I paid for my roundtrip flight from D.C. to L.A. thanks to my status as a US Airways Dividend Miles member.

50 - Approximation of homo-erotic statements and/or actions by my frat bros over the weekend...there was definitely a lot of "broin' out" going on.

120 - Seconds spent on a fake motorcycle with Sheena, Kent, Caren, and Bobby outside Treasure Island...this made for a YouTube-worthy DVD...I'll try to post it soon.

7027 - Our room number at Bally's... some reason although we were only on the 20th floor.

7033 - The room number at Bally's for my frat bros, about eight of them...this was either a really good thing, or a really bad idea. I'm still not sure.

364 - Number of days it'll take my body to recover from Vegas before I can go back.

Let me close by thanking Sheena for tagging along with me on this awesome trip, and Kent and Caren for being great hosts in L.A. and Bobby for getting us all together in Sin City.

First, A Goodbye

Friends and Colleagues,

I know it's only been a week, but it feels like much longer since I last wrote to you. If you don't mind, I wanted to take a moment and tell you a little bit about some recent and upcoming developments in my life, as a writer. Let me start by saying this diatribe is the most engaging, fun, and rewarding thing I've done as a writer.

Since I started this whole "Diatribes by Joah" thing, I've seen my distribution list grow from a dozen to more than 250 people; all of whom I consider friends and colleagues. I've written about politics and pro sports, concerts and confusion, relationships and risk. Throughout, I've tried to be three things above all else: honest, open, and insightful.

My writing influences range from Ben Franklin and F. Scott Fitzgerald to Malcolm Gladwell and Bill Simmons and I'd like to think I've taken something away from each of them as a writer. In being honest, open, and insightful, it's my full intent to call it like I see it, give you enough information to see where I'm coming from, and share my thoughts in a way that helps you see an issue/topic in a new light.

Writing is my favorite thing to do other than spending time with friends. It's the best opportunity I have to share my perspectives and thoughts without interruption, while still maintaining a high level of colloquialism. I want you to read this and think to yourself, "I can hear Joah saying that."

I'm getting verbose now, so I'll get to the point. Next week, "Diatribes by Joah" is going to the World Wide Web. Thanks to Typepad, I feel comfortable enough to do this in a user-friendly and minimalistic way that will maintain the simplicity of the emails you've been receiving thus far while allowing the public to be introduced to my writing.

Also, in coordination with the launch of that site, I will end a year-long practice by making these same blogs public on MySpace. I plan to archive all of the past 36 weeks of diatribes on the Typepad site as well. I will forward you all the link next week once I have the archives section complete.

Of similar importance, my oft-discussed, yet-to-be-released colllege-to-career guidebook Notes on the Class You Missed is in the final stages of editing and I'm looking for a graphics designer or good artist to do some work for the book (yes, you'd get paid), which will be released to a limited audience this fall. I'm in talks to sign a long-term book deal with a publisher to start my own publishing company, Joah's Ark, which will distribute all of my books except the Texas Press-backed book Real Role Models, which you can learn more about at http://realrolemodel.blogspot.com/.

Ultimately, making my diatribes public came down to my desire to be as widely read as possible. It's pointless to call yourself a writer if you're not willing to share your words with anyone outside of your immediate circle of friends and colleagues. So these diatribes, like me or not, are a major part of who I am and I realized that after 10 months, I'm ready to share them with the public. I also gave myself time to think about potential consequences and I don't think I've ever written something I'll reqret in 10 or 20 years (when I'm running for office), and there's nothing on here that would merit my being terminated by my current employer (legally at least).

So I guess this is a good-bye letter of sorts. While I've enjoyed all of your wonderful email comments after each diatribe, I'll now look forward to your readership and commenting on my Typepad site. When you do so, please keep in mind that my readers don't want to know your life story so if I write a blog about my career or love life, don't consider that a forum to comment by sharing all the details about your own (you can get your own blog for that kind of thing). Instead, the comments should be a place where you continue the discussion on each topic I address in the diatribe.

In closing, I wholeheartedly want to thank you for taking time out of your busy lives and weeks to spend a few minutes reading about whatever it was I wanted to talk about that day whether it was a movie or a failed relationship. I promise to continue being honest, open, and insightful. I hope it's not too much of a stretch for you to promise to be my friend no matter what I write.

Sincerely,

Joah