A list only I can make...5 Most Attractive Cities in America

This is extremely biased and subjective, but it’s also extremely well informed.

You best believe I'm going to brag here and say I've yet to meet anyone under 32 who travels to and understands American cities overall as well as I do. I spend more time consuming things about cities, on trips, from magazines, while listening to friends and people on planes, in bars and local establishments, etc., than pretty much anything else. Some people may know the West Coast or the East Coast really well, or the top 5 cities where they do business, but what about cities like Charleston, Memphis and various neighborhoods in New York and Chicago?

Also, I have some very attractive friends and know exactly where the attractive people are in most American cities. I've been single in the past (recently off the market) and use my time traveling very wisely. Each city has a different language, a different tenor and temperament. I usually know exactly what those things are within 24 hours. Lots of assumptions are made. So sue me.

All that goes to say that you may or may not agree with my list of the 5 Most Attractive Cities in America (for young professionals), but I think there's plenty validity to it.

[Disclaimer: I haven't been to Denver or Boise or Cleveland or Milwaukee before. If those cities have more attractive people than any of the ones I list here in the top 5, I'd be willing to walk on hot coals barefoot while eating a scoop of my favorite ice cream.]

This blog idea came to mind the other night when I was having dinner at Apothecary, one of those Austin establishments that seems to pull attractive women (a yoga place is next door). I was with some married friends I'd met on a plane ride back from San Francisco earlier this year who've lived in or traveled all over the place. They were were recently in Chicago and knew I'd be there for this past and the upcoming (Lolla) weekend and were interested in my opinion on what cities had the most attractive people. 

This list isn't necessarily something actionable. These aren't even necessarily the cities with the most approachable attractive people (like a Louisville or a Seattle). It’d be another blog for me to tell you what cities are best to meet someone new (which is definitely not New York or L.A.) But without further ado, let me start by telling you which cities didn't make the top five cut and why.

Too Cold Division (too damn cold to have extremely attractive people year-round): Boston, Chicago (more on this city later), Philadelphia, and Minneapolis

Too Little Excitement Division (not enough "action" to have extremely attractive people): St. Louis, Indianapolis, Kansas City, and any other city in the Midwest/Rust Belt region not named Chicago

Too Self-Righteous (too too-something to keep extremely attractive people around): D.C. (too self-important x too transient), Portland (too hipster x too white), San Francisco (too hippified x too techy)

[Huge miss on the 1st draft; now added the Step Children Division for San Diego and Pheonix. They're neither LA nor Vegas attractiveness-wise. But they're close enough to be honorabe mention.]

Honorable Mention:

Charleston (Upside: for kids who can't make it into Ivy League or top liberal arts schools, but love the beach; Downside: no diversity)

Louisville (Upside: check this out: in 2000, Louisville was 47.28% male and Charleston was 47.34%; no other cities were closer to New York City's gender balance (47.38%); Downside: Louisville?),

Seattle (Upside: cocktail bars, every major sport, outdoor activities, highly educated...a less cool-hunting, less pretentious version of San Francisco; Downside: When do you ever see skin?)

Houston and Dallas (Upside: Texas’ two biggest cities; bar scenes, sports, colleges, blonde hair; Downside: They’re not Austin)

Chicago (Upside: sort of like the best of New York style-wise and Austin culture-wise; Downside: Most people in the middle of the pack (i.e. the majority) are neither stylish like New Yorkers nor as fit / swimsuit-ready as Austinites).

The LIST

5a. Las Vegas: Tourists tourists tourists. The craziest, wildest lot of them. Plus the locals are bartenders, cocktail waitresses, door guys and strippers. You do the math.

5. Miami: South Beach. Double down on tourism, but its the Latin flavor be it Cuban or Brazilian that takes the temperature up a notch.

4. L.A.: Everyone done up. Makeup. Handbags. Calf implants. Everything done 'up'. Still, it's all about the face.

3. Atlanta: One of the top cities for gay men and straight men alike. Walk into an establishment and there are 50 guys, 50 girls. Sorry ladies, this may not work out for you.

2. Austin: Why are 25-to-34 year olds moving here more than anywhere? The weather. The laid back culture. The outdoor spirit and fitness. Barton Springs. ACL Festival. University of Texas. Concerts. South by Southwest. Attractiveness year-round. Still catching up on the diversity front though.

1. New York: It starts with the style. Sure, they're beautiful. Men. Women. Gay. Straight. Young. Old. Students. Professionals. White. Black. Asian. Latino. European. African. Jewish. Tall. Short. Thick. Petite. Happy. Sad. Depressed. Excited. Rich. Struggling. Whatever you want. It's all here. And they're all stylish as hell. Pretentious as all hell too.

Comments

[Chikodi Chima]

Sadly Seattle doesn't have a basketball franchise anymore, so all the major sports are no longer in the house. The home of the Zombie Sonics (OK City) isn't on your list, but I haven't been there. Notably absent is New Orleans. Too small for an honorable mention? I've also found Milwaukee to be laden with its own charms, and worth a visit. Fun read!